Woah, this is like the weirdest Simpsons episode ever. Lisa creates little people who form an accelerated civilization and attack Bart. What? Halloween, of course.
I broke me. It hurt. It hurtS. I fell down. Adam says no one over the age of six falls down. And I banged my wrist and at first it started turning blue, but then I put Hagen Daas on it and so now it's just red and swollen. Owww...
Also, my face is all burning off and stuff. What's with that?
I watched The Journey of Natty Gann last night for the first time since I was five or so. It's weird what you remember from that really formative time in your life. What I remember most from Natty Gann is meat, as it turns out. Every scene where someone eats, especially where someone is eating meat, is so familiar to me. I also started to wonder if my wanderlust comes from watching movies about train hopping when I was an infant. You never know ;)
I was just playing truth or dare with a dude from England who suddenly disappeared from AIM. Bum-mer. Is Gilmore Girls on tonight?
Posted by hKath at 8:29 PM ()
Friday, October 26
In which movie does Keanu Reeves say "I thought I had mono once for an entire year. Turns out I was just really bored,"?
Or is it Keanu? I keep thinking it is.
In any case, I think I know how he feels. How do you know if you have mono? More importantly, what do you do if you have mono? I mean, sleeping all day does prevent you from doing things such as cleaning, buying food and earning a living. Not to mention going to class. I'm going to get myself all worked up now thinking about how I have mono. Good for me. Maybe it'll give me some energy.
Please help me find that movie, it's really bugging me now.
Posted by hKath at 3:10 PM ()
Thursday, October 25
o/~ That'll never be me, that'll never be me, that'll never be, never be, no... never... no, never never never DON'T YOU EVEN THINK IT! o/~
God I love this movie.
So anyway, I survived. Barely. I kept walking into things last night. And twitching.
Eric Stoltz in a rooster suit. Cue Jeremy Piven and the Firebird keys line.
I was in the alley after work last night, in a violent thunderstorm, to take out the garbage. The lights were off (of course) so the only way I could see anything in front of me was when the lightning flashed.
"Hey, that's it! That's my house. I live there!"
And the puddles were up to my ankles and rushing around like little rivers. And I thought "If I fainted here, no one would find me." And then I thought "If I fainted here, I'd drown in a puddle."
"So what's your job this summer?"
"Being a great date."
Adam just saw The Man Who Wasn't There and might get to interview the Coen brothers soon. I'm not jealous anymore. I don't think I ever was.
I've always wondered about this scene in the movie. Why is Lloyd in Diane's bedroom helping her pick her outfit for their second date? Even if it is dinner at her house... shouldn't she already be dressed?
I've been thinking about putting something new that I've learned in every entry here. I had a really good one, but I don't remember it. But I'm sure I'll find one soon, so I'll keep writing until I do.
Ah, here's something.
What I learned today:I learned that I'm way more dependent on TV than I thought, because when I got up I thought my TV wasn't working and I seriously panicked.
Lloyd Dobler presents: "Cocoon"!
You know what else? Even though I know it's silly, I really don't have much faith in males. I don't really even know how to put it, other than the way I just did.
"Are you comfortable?"
"Yes. Are you shaking?"
"I don't think so."
"I don't think I am."
"Then why are you shaking?"
"I don't know... I'm happy."
I'm working over near Anna and Brandie's tonight. I'm pretty sure it's gonna suck. Although there is a slim chance I'll be working with Ingrid, the wanna-be stewardess. I like Ingrid :)
"Get ready for greatness, Lloyd!"
At least I'm not working at Danforth and Jones. Even though I could walk there from here, the possibility of having to spend another entire night with Fadhi makes me want to throw up. This man wears a shirt that's two sizes too small, and stretches the collar open as far as it'll go, then sticks as much chest hair as he can out of the hole.
"Lloyd, we shared the most intimate thing two people can share."
"You shared with a dick."
MC's little comment thing is fun... when you have time for it to load ;) I want to know if she had to move all of her files from blogger to somewhere else in order to get it.
Oooh, here it comes.
"She gave me a pen. I gave her my heart and she gave me a... pen."
This Onion archive is really throwing me for a loop. Could it be that they really don't archive ANYTHING? Oh, no... here's two articles. sigh. I'm bored. I think it's time to go back to bed.
"GUADALAJARA, MEXICO -- The world's scientific community is reeling in the wake of Monday's announcement that scientists at the University of Guadalajara have successfully copied a picture of a sheep.
'This is extremely exciting,' said team leader Professor
Manuel Cortines. 'We have created a precise duplicate copy of a sheep picture, identical in every way to the original. Except that it is not color.'
In 1994, the group almost successfully copied a sheep by applying ink to its body and pressing the animal against a giant sheet of paper, but the researchers were unable to hold the sheep still long enough to make a clear copy."
This has to be the strangest entry I've ever written. ADD, you know.
"Where's the ding?"
"It's coming. Any second now... Any second now."
Posted by hKath at 1:59 PM ()
Wednesday, October 24
Oh, also... you just hope that I don't turn into the class slut. First of all there's Kevin, who writes tremendously vivid poetry, likes Edgar Allen Poe and reminds me in an infinite number of ways of.... Seamus, of all people. Then there's Rebecca with even more amazing poetry and George the sexy South African sweetheart. And in place of honor, Saj whose vulgar technobabble blew my motherfucking circuits. He's beautifully brown, just shaved his head, is into philosophy and writes music.
And is making me sound like an ad for a dating service. Oh, dear God in heaven.
Posted by hKath at 3:19 PM ()
This could be damaging. In fact, it's potentially disastrous. But oh, so delicious.
This is the token "Right After Creative Writing Class" entry. Read at your own risk, although I'm not sure why it would be risky in any way, I just wanted to say that.
I finally read my story to the class today. In fact, I was the last person to go. I wasn't going to volunteer, especially since I knew of at least 2 other people who haven't read aloud yet either, but Velvet, my groupmate, started cheering for me enthusiastically. I was a little surprised: I seriously rattled this thing off in a sort of unfocused rush just this morning. I'm thinking maybe the stories should go up here somewhere, so you'll know what I'm talking about.
So I read the story aloud, feeling surprisingly at ease for most of it. And it got a *glowing* review! Unbelievable! People were pointing out details they loved right and left. I couldn't believe it. *That's* when my face started turning red. The only negative comment I got was that perhaps I used "that" a little too often to link a complement to a verb (heh). But they couldn't stop saying how detailed and subtle the story was, how smooth and credible.
I seriously am going to have a superiority complex soon. You mere mortals better watch out.
Anyway, so after everyone finished going on and on about my story, we all got up to leave. And this one girl, the super-involved Christina, came up to me and told me how much she thought the voice in my story was beautiful. And then she went on to tell me that she thought my speaking voice was equally as beautiful.
I smirked and said: "Are you coming onto me?"
Actually, what I said was "Err... thanks..."
Both because I was flustered beyond belief and because she's not my type at all. Way too clean-cut and eager, but you know. Also, her last piece was one long, skillful double-entendre about a blow job, so I'm fairly sure she wasn't coming onto me. But you never know.
I must be just emanating obnoxious confidence right now.
Posted by hKath at 3:07 PM ()
I've been up for five and a half hours already. In case you're counting (or in case this doesn't get posted in a long while) that's since FIVE-FIFTEEN in the morning. It felt good to get up that early. It felt less good (but more awake) after I'd had a cup of strong coffee and two glasses of water.
Last night I barely slept. I tossed, turned, kicked, swore and sweated. Looked at the clock: 3:50. Only an hour and a half of sleep left... Drifted off around quarter past four only to dream about not being able to sleep. I remember a really good dream I had about just that subject, but this wasn't it. This one featured me, cold beverages and not much else. It was almost as boring as being awake.
Then I woke up and wrote a story for my 11:30 class. It's not very good, and I forgot to bring the picture it's based on. But the point is I've basically already had an entire day, and I have 4 hours of school and 7 hours of work left. I'm going to get home at 1:30 AM. SOMEONE HELP ME!
Scrubs is a really good show. I'm surprised no one has said anything about it yet. I think it's cause they all watch Angel instead. NOOOOOO comment. But how can you spurn a show that has magic breasts and an ass pen (not to mention the "Ass Box") all in one episode? Not to mention the cool "Someone Who's Cool" video-inspired credits! My only gripe is that it definitely should be an hour long. Other comedies do it (*ahem*Crappy McBeal*ahem*).
I'm offended that The Mole is being delayed until mid-season. It's insane that people can like Survivor better. Or the Amazing Race, which is just a big rip-off of (what?) Love Potion #9... er, sorry, The Mole. Besides, I want to be the mole!!! Fiona and I have decided that I would make an excellent mole because I would always be telling people that I am the mole, and they wouldn't know how to take that.
Is it weirder than weird that at 6:00, after I'd showered and had coffee, when I sat down at my computer, AJ was here? No one should be here at 6:00!! Unless they've been awake since midnight, that is.
Posted by hKath at 11:11 AM ()
Tuesday, October 23
Oh dear god what is wrong with me? I can't stop sleeping. Like, seriously. I think perhaps a part of me has joined the cult of sleep. I was worshipping my pajamas a few weeks ago. There very pajamas that I'm wearing now. Last week I had one day when I felt awake. Saturday, I think. I don't feel awake now.
What do I need? Coffee? A meaningful emotional experience? Yoga? More sleep? I need to write this one-week late essay, is what I need.
Posted by hKath at 1:01 PM ()
Sunday, October 21
What is with all these people on the Sunday Night Sex Show? All they want to know about is making babies and being normal. Freaks.
Where are the goat-fuckers? Where are the people with their dicks caught in the bathtub drain? Where are the hermaphrodites? Where are the ultra-Christian myth-believers? The people whose threesomes backfired? Those who are fucking their bosses? Those who have gotten cell phones stuck in their pussies? WHERE ARE ALL THE GOOD CALLERS???
I think they screen them out to piss me off.
Posted by hKath at 11:12 PM ()
I'm stealing Sally's quiz cause I thought it was really neat :D Hope you don't mind, dear!
Do you like having your picture taken?- Depends how I'm feeling about myself. Usually, yes.
Have you ever done a photo shoot, professional or non?-
As a model, no...
If you could go anywhere in the world where would you
go and why?- I like where I'm living right now... and I honestly can imagine myself going anywhere. I suppose somewhere like Fiji would be nice, though I don't know what I'd do when I got there other than look around.
Who would you take with you on this little adventure?- I'm sure I have no clue. I'd probably want to set off by myself and see who I meet along the way.
Have you ever done crossword puzzles?- Duh... What's a crossword puzzle? Yes, I did two this morning.
Ever actually completed one?- finished both, but they were only "medium" level (whatever that means)
Pick up the closest book and write a sentence at random from it.- "It's the right look for someone who's about to approach a prostitute. I appear to have an old disease to share." - John Irving, 'A Widow For One Year'. It's my dad's, I haven't started it yet.
Do the same with a lyric from either a cd or the radio.- "Cause we're living in a world of fools, breaking us down, when they really should let us beeeeee, we belong to you and meeeeeee." Tried to do a CD, but was interrupted by the movie playing in the background.
Have you ever tried to analyze your own dreams?-
Of course, and I'm sure I've had a few breakthroughs.
What's your favorite color of post-it note?- Not very post-it note savvy, but I see orange ones a lot, and they're better than plain old yellow.
How many cd's do you own?- lots and lots.
Ever bought a cd for just one song?- Of course... Philosopher Kings, Dishwalla, Indigo Girls... ergh.
What would your perfect day consist of?- Lots of highway, twenty-four hour eateries and sleeping when I'm tired.
Have you ever lied to get off the phone or out of talking to someone on line?- No, if I don't want to talk I'll usually just not talk, because like, I don't want to talk. Simple, eh?
Have you ever written a survey?- Nah, survey questions have always mystified me: they're always either subtly brilliant or completely retarded. Does "shampoo or conditioner?" ring a bell?
Is your vcr flashing 12:00 all the time?- No, but it was until Fiona fixed it last night to tape... something. Can't remember what.
About how many times a year are you sick?- 3 or 4? I don't know.
Ever been in an airplane?- Yes, but I don't enjoy them, they make me feel decisively unhungry.
If so where were you flying to?- I've flown to Florida, Edmonton and Greece (by way of Toronto and Rome).
What color are your shoes?- I'm barefoot right now, but my shoes are navy blue.
What color are your eyes?- green. Yay, green!
Describe your bedroom, include all details.- um, no? This will take way too long, because my room is a mess. The bed is wedged between the northern wall and the back of my dresser, which means I have to climb onto it by the foot. It's never made and typically is half covered in books, videotapes, extra blankets and stuffed animals while I sleep on the other side. My dresser is currently dominated by a TV and VCR, and is covered by books, cards, empty cans, candles, loose CDs and jars of some sort. I also have a small filing cabinet on which my CD player sits. There's a freaky space-hamper, full, and my computer desk, which houses old plates, some papers, and the phone. The printer table has more papers, and there are two Ikea storage bins with videotapes and various other things inside. The closet door hangs open very often. All the CDs have fallen out of my CD tower because it is on uneven ground and tips over often. And finally, there are two small Ikea bookshelves (circa 1985) which are nearly bursting with books and have even more books piled on top of them. Poor bookshelves.
Name one person your life is made better by- Right now, I'll pick one and say AJ, because he pisses me off the least ;) Also because we really talk.
Would you or have you ever shaven your head?- yes, yes. Everyone should.
How about someone else's?- Only if they asked first, and only if they REALLY didn't want to do it themselves. Because, like, it's so much more FUN to do it yourself!
Can you do math with ease?- Bah! This question is beneath me. Behind my cool exterior lies a dormant math geek.
What size is your computer screen?- Really, really small. Like a tiny little porthole, only not round.
If you could only talk to one person online who would
that be?- I don't communicate very well through the internet, so I don't know who I'd pick, out of my friends. So I'll just say, like, Jon Rosenberg or something. There, picked at random.
Name your favorite type of music and why- I don't know... folk-punk-r&b-rock-funk-ska-country?
What famous person dead or alive would you interview if you had the chance?- Phillip Seymour Hoffman, because maybe if I made him laugh, he'd make me his concubine. Geez, I dunno!
Which movie can you watch and say the lines along with the actors?- There are a few now that I work in a videostore. Ferris Bueller's Day Off, The Emperor's New Groove, O Brother Where Art Thou?, Clerks and The Commitments come to mind.
Name one of your passions in life- again, there are many. I'll have to go with the all-encompassing "art".
What's your least favorite time of day?- EARLY MORNING!
Who's your favorite member in a band, singer, guiter, bass, drummer, and why?- I'm with Sally on this. Who can answer that? Fetishists, I guess. Drummer or bass player fetishists. Do those exist? I once thought so ;) I like people who have energy, but I don't usually have favourite band members, that's mean.
Do you use hairspray or gel?- Right now, nothing. In a few weeks, when my hair gets long, I might go back to gel... or I'm thinking of trying this stuff that comes in a jar and makes your hair all messy-looking. Don't know what you'd call that. A creme?
Describe your favorite meal- All-you-can-eat sushi!
What color is the inside of your head when you close
your eyes?- Black with brownish-red streaks.
Ever listen to classical music?- Sometimes, but I like playing it better than listening to it.
Say one thing you've learned today- Is it sad that I can't think of something right away? (No, it's sad that the dude is about to jump off the bridge in Saturday Night Fever... woo! There he goes. Now that's sad.) That there are still pigeons in the Piazza San Marco.
What is the best present you've ever given someone else?- "Ram My Rectum and Squirt" and "Bi-Bi Love", two very underappreciated gifts to a roommate.
What is the best present someone else has ever given to you?- Probably my videocamera, though I don't use it as much as I should.
So hey, what's your full name?- Katherine Elizabeth Marie Maheux
Describe yourself while drunk- the same, only louder and less intelligent.
How big are the windows in your house?- Size is no real issue, as they are underground and give off almost no light anyway. Still, I do enjoy their presence.
Do you wear a watch?- I can't even stand to be without my watch for twenty minutes. I start freaking out. "Am I supposed to be at work now?"
What's the kinkiest thing you've ever done with someone else?- I dunno... written gay porn? I save my kinky moments for when I'm on my own, thanks.
What's the largest age difference between you and someone you've dated?- four years? I think.
How many mirrors do you have?- There are five in my apartment: one in the living room, one in the bathroom, two in my room and one in Fiona's room. However, the small one in my room and the one in Fiona's room are the only ones I actually OWN. The bathroom mirror and the other one in my room came with the house, and the living room mirror was left behind my MC when she left Hill Haus. Not that that matters. I'll say 3 or something.
Write one sentence stating what you want people to say about you after you've passed on- "Katherine was the first human to live to 200." How's that? I think I've finally cracked the non-corny code.
Have you ever sailed?- Meaning done the sailing myself? No.
How fast can you run?- I'm naturally pretty fast, but am currently way out of shape, so I'd have to say I'm terribly speedy... until the first block.
What do you believe in?- The goodness of humanity?
How long does it take you to get ready to go out?- About five minutes: put on clothes, check hair, grab snack, apply lipstick (optional), go. I'm alotting a very generous one minute each here.
Do you shower daily? If not how often?- Usually daily, unless I'm too depressed to bother.
Describe the ideal superpower and what you would do if you had it- I'd have the ability to see the absolute truth, and to make others speak the truth. That way all the hypocrites would be exposed and tossed aside.
Are candles romantic or a fire hazard?- Neither, they're "cozy", which is quite different.
Name something you've done in the last 24hrs no matter how big or small- I made Rebecca smile by telling her I liked her hair.
Do you wear necklaces, bracelets, anklets, earrings.
rings?- I wear two necklaces that never come off: a blue shimmery turtle and a woven choker which I made myself. I try to wear earrings sometimes but with my shaved head it really makes me look pretty scary.
What colors are you wearing right now?- green pyjama pants and a white T-Shirt.
How often do you change the sheets on your bed?-
not often enough, as they are constantly covered in crumbs.
Have you ever gotten lost? If so explain- Not permanently, no. I'm here, aren't I?
What's on your computer desk?- My cell phone, the land phone, some Blistex, a loose Dan Bern CD and an empty Cake jewelcase, two operating manuals for different objects, a bowl which used to contain ice cream, an empty bottle, an EFO bootleg tape, a candle, some really disgusting candies that I haven't gotten around to throwing out yet, a magazine holder filled with papers, an empty glass, two plates and my scanner. Oh, and my computer.
When your talking do you ever use your hands to do quotation marks in the air when saying certain words?- WAY too often, especially lately because I'm awfully bitter at customers these days ;) (Oh, pardon me if I "offended" you)
Which landmark would you climb if you could?- I wouldn't mind climbing down into the Grand Canyon, but climbing up things just seems like a waste to me.
Do you own or have you read, or thought of reading any self-help books?- I don't think I own any, I started reading this mother-daughter question book that had questions a lot like these in it, but decided against sharing the experience with my mother until after she gives up the right to hit me.
Ever seriously questioned your sanity?- Of course. I often wonder if I could potentially become a serial killer, and what could set me off. Also I wonder if I say all my thoughts out loud and just don't realize it.
What's in your fridge right now?- Oh, lots. We're set. Water, milk, two different kinds of pasta, chocolate syrup, lettuce, bread, condiments, cream cheese, other kinds of cheese, margarine, eggs, other stuff...
How many people do you live with?- Just one.
Have you or would you ever do anything more than kiss
in a public area?- I'm sure I *could*, but whether I *will* remains to be seen.
What is the strangest thing you've ever done?- Stared at a screensaver for five hours.
Name an instrument you've never played but would like
to- drums are I believe the only instrument I haven't yet tried.
Have you ever been on tv or the radio?- Yes, both. I was in that Mr. Jones TVO Frucon thing in 1998... actually, I found the video crew. Probably I should have led them off a cliff instead of to the Con. My jacket and my ass are also in the I Will Hold On video. And I've been on the radio (believe it or not) to talk about the X-Files.
What is the worst thing anyone could ever do to you?- Lie to me in order to exclude me.
Are you a fast typer?- Let's just say I learned to type in Catholic school.
How high have you counted before getting bored?- I've never tried before either, but I'm sure I wouldn't get past twenty-three. That's when it starts getting repetitive.
Describe how you sleep. (ie. your position and/or how
you fall asleep)- I fall asleep on either side, and usually wake up on my back with my arms up above my head.
Are you straight, bi, gay?- Bi.
Do you ever do something else while on the computer?- Currently, I'm writing this and watching TV. I could also be on the phone, eating, doing crosswords or playing guitar. I know, I know... ADD-o-rama.
What is the most expensive item you own?- Probably my videocamera.
How about the least expensive?- You can take your pick of any of my four Women and Songs compilations. I can't GIVE those away.
What's your favorite card game to play?- Poker, with friends. Or Taxi with my family.
What do you do online?- email, write here, chat, read journals, read newsgroups, and keep up with brunching, the onion and goats. I've lost my sense of adventure.
Have you ever watched a movie and not understood it? If so which one?- I'm pretty sure it was just pure crap, but I'd love to know if there was some "special" message that I was supposed to get from Dr. T and the Women.
Do people pick up your slang language more than you
pick up their's?- I pick up theirs a lot more.
Are you easily influenced by other people, or currant
trends?- Too out of touch to be influenced by trends, too oblivious to be influenced by others.
What makes you unique in your own opinion?- My lack of pretense mixed with my need to be involved with other people.
Name your worst quality- I can be pretty hot-headed and often overreact.
Name your best- my honesty
What would you like to do with your life?- write and drive.
Do you blowdry your hair?- No. I don't have enough right now, but even when I do have hair, it just fills it up with static.
Have you ever intentionally set a clock ahead or behind the actual time?- No, but if a clock goes out of whack I'll usually just let it go and adjust the time in my head because I'm lazy.
What do you think about when you first wake up in the
morning?- I try to remember my dreams.
Which browser do you use?- Netscape.
Do you bite your nails?- Yes, and my fingers. Yuck, I know.
Tell me about your dream last night- I don't remember it. Actually, I haven't remembered any dreams in quite a while.
Ever seen a shooting star?- Yes.
Have you ever stayed in a fancy high class rich hotel?- Well, I thought it was, in Cincinnati. The doors were thicker than my head and the carpets were really cushy, so to me it was classy.
Have you ever stayed in a rent-by-the-hour motel?- heehee, no.
How are you feeling right now?- Sleepy, and like I've wasted my whole day.
Which website do you frequent most often?- my own, probably.
What color is most of your clothes?- green.
Who do you miss?- AJ, MC, Sally, Gella, Chrissy, Mindy, Jen, and a whole bunch of others who live far away from me.
Name something you just can't forget no matter how hard you try- The ultimate "us and them"ness of the world I personally live in.
Describe the worst fight you've ever been in whether
physical or verbal- When I was moving out, and Dave came outside and yelled at me for taking the money he owed me out of the rent that I did not owe them, and no one was really listening and he wouldn't stop screaming, so finally my mom and I just got in the car and drove away. That one really hurt.
Say something else about yourself you've never told anyone before- Sometimes I have a fetish.
Posted by hKath at 7:12 PM ()
It's going to be dark in a couple of hours and I haven't even gotten dressed yet, haven't done one productive thing. Well, productive by anyone else's standards... I feel I've accomplished quite a bit already just by watching Hannibal and using my brain.
After analysing The Silence of the Lambs in great detail, I was sure Hannibal was going to throw the delicate balance between the traditional neoconservative horror film and the progressive, more subversive horror film so far out of whack that I was going to need a chainsaw to get it back. Turns out, I didn't really have to worry. I don't think Ridley Scott was smart enough to pick up on the presence of dualism in the original film, so he certainly wasn't smart enough to cut it out of the sequel.
And David Mamet? Well, I'd like to credit him with every genuine character moment in the movie, if I may. Even though I have no idea if they're his or not.
That said, they should never have made this movie. The fictional world threatens to collapse every time Clarice and Lecter are in the same space with no glass separating them.
And what was with the blood-thirsty hogs?
Julianne Moore looked like no one told her she was in a movie. I never realized what a bad actress she was until I contrasted her with Jodie Foster (who hasn't been doing anything lately, where the hell is the lady?).
Now I'm watching Saturday Night Fever, but frankly, all of my critical thinking cells have been used up for the day. It's going to be dark soon and I want to crawl back into bed.
Chrissy, I like your new design... I think it's beautiful :) I also want to say thanks for emailing me, though I couldn't quite think of what to say other than "eek" so here's the "eek".
Chin up, y'all (ghetto Mary Poppins, there)
Posted by hKath at 4:56 PM ()